Thursday, November 21, 2013

Day 995

There are so many things I thought would be different. I thought 1000 days in my life would have found me full of remarkable changes. I've accomplished so much but feel like I've changed so little.

I've seen some successes. I made it back to work and now have a dream job. I've done so much sewing for charity with quilts and stockings and pillows. I've written a book. I've conquered my fear of heights. I bought a place for retirement. I've supported my husband through a bad bout with kidney failure. I've seen my daughter get engaged. I've seen our cat grow smaller and weaker. I've traveled and sucked out all the marrow of life. I've gotten a couple tattoos to inspire me to keep plugging along.

What an amazing life I have. But I've taken thousands of pills, given myself hundreds of injections, and had several rounds of infusions all in the attempt to make my self well. And it hasn't worked. Here I am, 995 days later, and the pain and stiffness and fatigue drains me as much today as it did back then. Living these last few months with only one working lung has made life even more difficult.

Yet. 

Yet each and every day I get myself out of bed. Each and every day I find something to take a picture of. Each and every day I turn to this blog to help me through the next step (and misstep). 

What will I do without it? What will I do without you cheering me on?

5 comments:

  1. Just give me the opportunity, and I will keep cheering you on every day. Could you imagine if you had just settled, settled for the pain and sat back. Just pour over your photos that document your life, no matter the pain or set back, perseverance reaped the fruit of creativity, faithfulness, blessing others who did not expect their life to be the way they found it either. I think I have grown in compassion and grace experiencing your journey, to take even that baby step to move ahead you do every day. You have given gifts of words, images, fabric, stitches that enrich and triumph over the circumstances you are found in. That is the joy and satisfaction in living in an imperfect world. You have been fighting a great fight and remember the days of the roses and sunsets and beautiful cookies that you made. Pain does not erase that, it just wearies us.

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  2. Just keep on keepin' on! You can DO IT! Pam

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  3. You were a strong person who did all those things prior to creating this blog and I'm sure you will continue on after. We love you for sharing yourself with us! Carry on my friend ~Lisa

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